My GF/BF just came and went through a cycle of high/low, and I wish I took more advantage of it.
At that little ren faire she was helping with, there were a few guys hanging around a campfire and having beer, she joined in and explained that she wanted to be a he. All these drunk guys went "You're a dude in our books", and that made her happy. Ecstatically happy. Happy enough that I got to fuck her in her vagina. I know the concept of "feeling manly makes the thought of putting a penis in my cooch easier" doesn't make too much sense. But whatever I rolled with it. I tried to make her feel manly, and loved all the sex I got for it. Life was good and I didn't feel the need to blog my issues.
Then last Thursday, we got this crazy idea to dress her up like a girl and do a photo shoot. Even though she looks a heck of a lot like a boy most of the time, when she flaunts off her figure, she's got something fierce. Which may have led to her downfall. I got turned on by this hot chick in front of me, and she got reminded that her body isn't what she wants it to be at all. So there was a night of good sex. Then there was a morning of O.K. sex. Then there was the last few days of feeling no where near what she was a week ago.
When she's not happy, I'm not happy. Partly because my crotch soldier can't get happy. And I want to help, I do, it's just that my damn hormones keep getting in the way of being a loving individual instead of just a horny fuck.
Also I have another issue. She is 8 days late on her period. I keep bringing that up in my mind and thinking "Oh Fuck, she preggers, mother is going to kill me." Then again she has also told me that she hasn't really been keeping track of her periods until last January. Now I don't know Vaginas too well, but I think that I don't think I could tell how long my cycle is in just two months, so I'm feeling a little better. But still there is that thought in my head of "I'm going to have a little baby boy. Then my mother is going to nail her baby boy to the wall."
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Notes of a True Scotsman
I had a weird thought cross my mind this morning. "Why do I need underwear today?" Its something I've been thinking about for a while, in the modern society, we do not need undergarments as much as those who live before toilet paper. Heck, I'm seeing my GF today, one more layer between me and her cooch might be a bad thing.
So, I woke up early, took a shower, got together some shit, and went down to see my girlfriend. Where was my girlfriend was and has been for the past few days is this local yearly renn fair. I had a few blankets for her so I got in thirty minuets early holding just one load saying "Deliveries" to the guy at the front gate. Other than that, I bummed around for a while, looking at all the shit that people brought to sell. Everything from smocks to swords, and some more. After she got off her shift that pretty much earned her a free ticket in, we went around looking at all the clothes.
She convinced me to buy a kilt. I admit, its cool. By that I mean, the breeze that goes up there. After I buy it, we both go into this single stall, mens bathroom. She had convincing enought facial hair, that was once mine. yay latex glue Anyway, I put the kilt on and take my pants off underneath. Then I remember that I didn't have any underwhere that day. And my girlfriend has my pants and are not agreeing to give them back. What a bitch.
The rest of the day I was nervous, just that one little breeze that would send my thin kilt up enough to show my ass off to a little girl that has a father that will beat my ass and mother that will get me permantly on a Sex Offender list. I have normal worries. But it was late in the day, and soon enough, we went back to her tent. And fucked hard. In kilts. Awesome.
So, I woke up early, took a shower, got together some shit, and went down to see my girlfriend. Where was my girlfriend was and has been for the past few days is this local yearly renn fair. I had a few blankets for her so I got in thirty minuets early holding just one load saying "Deliveries" to the guy at the front gate. Other than that, I bummed around for a while, looking at all the shit that people brought to sell. Everything from smocks to swords, and some more. After she got off her shift that pretty much earned her a free ticket in, we went around looking at all the clothes.
She convinced me to buy a kilt. I admit, its cool. By that I mean, the breeze that goes up there. After I buy it, we both go into this single stall, mens bathroom. She had convincing enought facial hair, that was once mine. yay latex glue Anyway, I put the kilt on and take my pants off underneath. Then I remember that I didn't have any underwhere that day. And my girlfriend has my pants and are not agreeing to give them back. What a bitch.
The rest of the day I was nervous, just that one little breeze that would send my thin kilt up enough to show my ass off to a little girl that has a father that will beat my ass and mother that will get me permantly on a Sex Offender list. I have normal worries. But it was late in the day, and soon enough, we went back to her tent. And fucked hard. In kilts. Awesome.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Manty trouble
I like little social experiments, changing little things about yourself to see if anyone notices. No one has however. Shave one arm, nothing. Dye beard purple, no one notices until halfway through the day. Mostly because, as it turns out, hair dye doesn't always make your hair the color you want it to. It just turned it a little red. kinda makes me look Irish.
Anyways, I mostly came up here to tell you about my new experiment, mantyhose. We got this weird thing in our school where you dress up to show school spirit on the indicated days. Monday is Jean Jacket day, Tuesday is Camo day Wednesday is Ugly Sweater day and there's some more days in the week but whatever. The important bit is Camo day, I have a pair of camoflauge pantyhose. And women, are your ankles the same size as your thighs, because apparently who ever makes the camo tights I have thinks that women are built like that. One size fits all my ass.
Anyways, I mostly came up here to tell you about my new experiment, mantyhose. We got this weird thing in our school where you dress up to show school spirit on the indicated days. Monday is Jean Jacket day, Tuesday is Camo day Wednesday is Ugly Sweater day and there's some more days in the week but whatever. The important bit is Camo day, I have a pair of camoflauge pantyhose. And women, are your ankles the same size as your thighs, because apparently who ever makes the camo tights I have thinks that women are built like that. One size fits all my ass.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
I always just blog about my problems, I need to explain how good I have it some time.
My girlfriend is probably off fucking some other guy right now. By fucking I mean that she's the one with the strap on and he's bent over.
I don't quite know how much this bothers me. I know, I know, I don't know what I know actually. I want to say I'm fine with it, in some respects I am. I'm decently sure that she's not going to run off with him. But its this thing that she can't get everything she needs from me anymore. She needs to feel like a he, she needs to feel manly. She wants to be my bottom, she wants to be my thing to fuck, but she can't, not without turning into a useless pile of emotionally unstable mush.
She also convinced that whenever she fucks me, that I get emotionally torn up as she does inside. Which isn't true, I kinda like it. Actually, I like it a lot.
Between a choice of nothing at all or getting fucked, I would defiantly choose the latter, if nothing else but to be with her/him/whatever that thing I love is.
I don't quite know how much this bothers me. I know, I know, I don't know what I know actually. I want to say I'm fine with it, in some respects I am. I'm decently sure that she's not going to run off with him. But its this thing that she can't get everything she needs from me anymore. She needs to feel like a he, she needs to feel manly. She wants to be my bottom, she wants to be my thing to fuck, but she can't, not without turning into a useless pile of emotionally unstable mush.
She also convinced that whenever she fucks me, that I get emotionally torn up as she does inside. Which isn't true, I kinda like it. Actually, I like it a lot.
Between a choice of nothing at all or getting fucked, I would defiantly choose the latter, if nothing else but to be with her/him/whatever that thing I love is.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Whryyyyyyyyyyyy
Fucking hate my life right now.
Not that's its been a particularly bad day, it's just has ended in a way that I do not want happening. Lately my girlfriend, and I say girlfriend here just because I'm use to her being my girlfriend, has been hanging out with her best friend a lot. Not that that's bad, she should have a life. But her best friend use to have a boyfriend and use to be going to home school. Which is just doing homework a lot. But there is an important bit there of "use to". Now she doesn't, now they can hang out all the freaking time. Which is kinda digging into my sex life. Which really pissing me off.
And me and her and everyone we know is kinda joining in of No Fap Feburary, this has not been as fun as a month as I thought it would be. and it's only a week into it.
Not that's its been a particularly bad day, it's just has ended in a way that I do not want happening. Lately my girlfriend, and I say girlfriend here just because I'm use to her being my girlfriend, has been hanging out with her best friend a lot. Not that that's bad, she should have a life. But her best friend use to have a boyfriend and use to be going to home school. Which is just doing homework a lot. But there is an important bit there of "use to". Now she doesn't, now they can hang out all the freaking time. Which is kinda digging into my sex life. Which really pissing me off.
And me and her and everyone we know is kinda joining in of No Fap Feburary, this has not been as fun as a month as I thought it would be. and it's only a week into it.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Clods explain relationships.
You know what my relationship is right now, to explain it to you best, I got to use a metaphor.
Relationships in general is like being a young guy working at an up-scale restaurant, OK? You generally have two choices, working as a waiter, or working valet. They're not really that different of jobs, you can both run into crappy customers, you get about the same pay and you can get good tips if you are nice. Then there are some other people who want to go higher and be a chef, but let's not talk about them.
Most guys would say, "I wanna be a waiter", for one or more of a variety of reasons. They would want just the pleasure of working with the food all the time. The might not ever want to be a valet guy, they like cars, don't get them wrong, but for something serious, they wanna serve food. It's just what their parents and the rest of society would prefer them to do.
Some guys would say, "Yea, bring on the cars," cuz they're just like that. They might tell about how serving food to people can be a pain and not fun at all, just not worth the time. That cars can more easily speak their language then a bitchy customer that expects you to know what they want. Sometimes, they might want to stay with a car and be recognized as being together for the rest of their life, but that's not legally possible in most states just yet.
Then you get some guys who wouldn't mind either one that came their way, they are just cool like that. The situation I'm in now is when I was in some job waiting tables, I liked my job, nice benefits, easy hours. Then one day, my boss, who is apparently the creator of all of us who I'm getting more and more sure each day is myself, came up and said to me, "You, you're going to go valet now. Got it?" Most men at this point would say, "No way, fuck that, fuck you, I'm outta here." But I'm not most guys, what I said was "What's the worst that can happen."
Relationships in general is like being a young guy working at an up-scale restaurant, OK? You generally have two choices, working as a waiter, or working valet. They're not really that different of jobs, you can both run into crappy customers, you get about the same pay and you can get good tips if you are nice. Then there are some other people who want to go higher and be a chef, but let's not talk about them.
Most guys would say, "I wanna be a waiter", for one or more of a variety of reasons. They would want just the pleasure of working with the food all the time. The might not ever want to be a valet guy, they like cars, don't get them wrong, but for something serious, they wanna serve food. It's just what their parents and the rest of society would prefer them to do.
Some guys would say, "Yea, bring on the cars," cuz they're just like that. They might tell about how serving food to people can be a pain and not fun at all, just not worth the time. That cars can more easily speak their language then a bitchy customer that expects you to know what they want. Sometimes, they might want to stay with a car and be recognized as being together for the rest of their life, but that's not legally possible in most states just yet.
Then you get some guys who wouldn't mind either one that came their way, they are just cool like that. The situation I'm in now is when I was in some job waiting tables, I liked my job, nice benefits, easy hours. Then one day, my boss, who is apparently the creator of all of us who I'm getting more and more sure each day is myself, came up and said to me, "You, you're going to go valet now. Got it?" Most men at this point would say, "No way, fuck that, fuck you, I'm outta here." But I'm not most guys, what I said was "What's the worst that can happen."
Friday, January 22, 2010
Lighting, fuck yea!
I hate going green.
I mean, some bits, I like the idea of saving the earth and all that, but the small earth saving tips seem really bad. Mostly the light bulbs, I do not like floresent lightbulbs, they take forever to warm up. When I turn on a lightbulb, I want light, not to wait for a while, then be able to see whatever it is I'm doing.
Then I thought I would go one step further, LED bulbs. They hurt my eyes. I don't know what it is about them, but the wavelength of light does not agree with my eyes at all, so they're fucking useless.
Looks like I'm going to go with the incandescent lighting for now. Oh well, fuck the planet. And Al Gore.
I mean, some bits, I like the idea of saving the earth and all that, but the small earth saving tips seem really bad. Mostly the light bulbs, I do not like floresent lightbulbs, they take forever to warm up. When I turn on a lightbulb, I want light, not to wait for a while, then be able to see whatever it is I'm doing.
Then I thought I would go one step further, LED bulbs. They hurt my eyes. I don't know what it is about them, but the wavelength of light does not agree with my eyes at all, so they're fucking useless.
Looks like I'm going to go with the incandescent lighting for now. Oh well, fuck the planet. And Al Gore.
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